Tuesday, July 27, 2010

What do you call an enclosure constructed specifically for the genus loxondonta?

Many of you (A Mrs Trellis of North Baker Street) will have been sitting as if permanently attached to their chairs, staring with anticipation at their monitors, waiting for my verdict on the latest Monday evening entertainment to be perpetrated by our friends at the BBC.

I refer of course to the latest attempt to squeeze on last drop of haemoglobin out of the basalt by another dramatisation of the Holmes stories. Oh dear. Seldom can we have seen a production so up itself. High camp and silliness abounds in this series which appears not to know whether it is Batman, Carry on up the Bakerloo line or Harry Potter. 

Mark Gatiss was excellent as Dr Chinnery. Unfortunately the book he attempted to write was rubbish, and he has now turned to thespianism. What a shame. 

But what I really wanted to write about was something that seems to happen in most crime series and films. It is as annoying as all American telephone numbers having the area code 555. It is not as annoying as David Cameron but I am still going to complain. 

In this instance, Holmes and Watson get in a taxi in Baker Street in daylight. When they arrive in Brixton it is night. Not dusk, not overcast, but black. I cannot think of a good reason for this. If Holmes is the cleverest man in London (a bit like saying the most handsome man in Norfolk), then why does he tolerate a taxi driver taking several hours to travel seven or eight miles? Do the producers/writers/continuity checkers believe that Brixton is in a different time zone? I shall not rest until I know the answer. This, more than all of the other nonsense, campery and absurd storylines made the whole production ludicrous and unbearable. I shall be watching again next week.

(I shall be awarding points in the comments section. You know to what I am referring.)


Anonymous said...

'e got a cabby wot 'ad'n done the knowledge.

Richard said...

I was in the pub when it was on. I did wonder if you'd caught it. The sound was off but I guessed the three patch problem joke. Just after that they turned over to Sky Sports News. My one gripe, from what I saw anyway, is that they showed the door to 221b Baker St. I used to work about 50 yards away in Baker St and at the time, the plot was famously occupied by the HQ of the Abbey National and was a bloody great office block. Did they have to rebuild it?

Scarlet Blue said...

Did you mean loxodonta?
Is the answer: A room.
The question is: Have I over thought this?

Geoff said...

I think just a few people might have described it as Sherlock Wholmes. So I won't say that.

I watched about two minutes of flashing images and needed a lie down.

Rol said...

Well, I liked it.

But then, I liked Morse.

Do I get two points?

Christopher said...

Mmm. Popular though 'Sharlockoms' is in France, it wasn't shown here.

One day I should very much like you to sharpen your loxodontal tusks on Conan Doyle's references to Holmes' violin-playing, which, when put together, are unwittingly very entertaining.

Rog said...

I thought it was another bloody Homes programme so missed it! New Holmes in the Country, where they turn down a dream thatched cottage because of the A30 half a mile away and then itb turns out they live on the South Circular and Kevin bloody Macguire or Sarah bloody Beany does an "I told you so" piece after they'd re-edited their earlier contribution and Kirsty and Phil come poting and shouting and....

I'll get me coat.

MJ said...

Why don't you watch a proper show like Corrie?

The Birdwatcher said...

Well I liked it as well. Then I guess I'm just sad as I missed it on Sunday so enjoyed it on the i player thingy.

Robynn's Ravings said...

I have no idea what your show is but as an American, I'm obliged to gush over anything produced on the BBC because everyone knows it far exceeds our paltry offerings. Unless it's that horrid show about throwing everything a person eats for a week out onto the table for perusal. Nauseating. Then we have to hear how many "stones" they've gained or lost. Take the stones out of the producers head and everyone would be better off.

And dare I.....tremulously.....with great trepidation.....tell you that 555 is actually a prefix and not an area code? And it bugs every American, too. Apparently, Hollywood is VERY worried about actually producing a valid phone number. May I give them yours?

Dave said...

I'm back from holiday. You can try writing somthing funny now.

Vicus Scurra said...

As this thread is now dormant, I can give the answer to my quiz with little danger of it being discovered.

"Elephantery, my dear Watson".

Scarlet Blue said...

Or Tusk.
Where is Rog?