Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Who am I?

I was in receipt of an email today from someone who shares my name, and had changed their email address. However, they appear to have given all of their contacts my email address.

I have had several interesting (from my point of view) exchanges today.

(I should clarify that when I say they share my name, I mean that they have the same name as me. We do not actually take it in turns to own the name. That would be silly.)

This evening I received a message from dear old Carolyn, thus:

Hi,
Just wanted to confirm your plans for the 4th.
Still coming to see Jerry on the Fri. before 4th and then coming to beach house?
Do you know the way? We have new 73/74 hwy open now. Let me know what your plans are. What time to expect you.

Love you and looking forward to seeing all of you.

I replied:

Hi!
Who are you?
My plans for the 4th what?
For the 4th anniversary of Margaret Thatcher's death my plans are to dance on her grave, possibly a tap dance, but that all depends on the weather and how much longer she can hold on for.
For the 4th course of dinner tomorrow, I will probably have some of the date slice that my wife made at the weekend.
For the 4th round of the T20 cricket competition, I rather fancy Durham to beat Sussex.
You really should learn to be more specific.
I haven't seen Jerry for ages. She started to campaign on behalf of those with erectile dysfunction, and I took that as a personal slight. Whatever problems she had with Jagger should not reflect on the rest of us.
I would be happy to come to the beach house, provided that you can assure me there will be no sand, due to my allergy.
My plans are to live a happy, fulfilled and utilitarian life, and to persecute those people who are careless with the spelling of email addresses.
See all of me? I am overweight, but not obese. Or are you suggesting something more intimate? If you do manage to see all of me, I shall probably be blushing all over, you saucy young thing.

love and peace

15 comments:

The Mistress said...

I should very much like to see your bare bottom.

Anonymous said...

Are we still permitted to do a LOL? Cos I just done one.

Vicus Scurra said...

MJ. Will you never learn? Do not be surprised to receive another reprimand from the Google family. Restraint and good taste are the watchwords here.
MIT - please go ahead. I like loling, and feel free to have done a ROFL should the whim take you, although I am not sanguine about the capability of my writing to produce such an effect. However, should you go as far as to do a LMAO or LMFAO, I shall not believe you.

Tim F said...

I'll have some of that date slice if there's any left. I like a bit of date slice, I do.

You can keep your arse to yourself though.

Romeo Morningwood said...

Don't forget to bring a bottle of fresh Australian wine, shave your legs, and bring your scale model of the Hadron Collider..I'm sure that will make a fine ice breaker should the conversation stall.

Dave said...

These things do fall in your lap, don't they?

I, Like The View said...

Carolyn fell in Vicus' lap? I didn't read that bit!

Vicus Scurra said...

NB - MJ left a comment which has now (09:00 BST 16 June) disappeared.

Tim. I think that sharing date slice and keeping my arse to myself will be the code by which I live from now on. I will endeavour to let you know how that works out.
Donn. I am not sure what kind of event Carolyn was hosting. Are you familiar with her?
Dave. See the comment that ILTV made.
ILTV. Dave has an over developed imagination. He does, however, deserve our sympathy.

Rog said...

tee hee

Ms Scarlet said...

Ho Ho.
Sx

Christopher said...

...but what was Carolyn's further reply? Did she pick up the ball and run with it?

MJ said...

Dammit. Since my blog fiasco, all my comments are disappearing on everyone's posts.

But I still want a photo of that arse.

Zig said...

T He

Rimshot said...

I wish I was clever like that.

Vicus Scurra said...

Christopher. They aren't playing. Bastards.

Rimshot. Stay around, some of it might rub off. Missus.