Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Staggering through the rye

I am obliged to my friends at BBC News who inform me that alcohol kills 1 in 20 Scots. This is very good news indeed, as I infer that 95% of my caber-tossing cousins, my porridge-devouring pals, as it were, are immune to the effects of intoxicating libations, and can indulge with even less consideration than they had shown. Good for you, McTavish!


zIggI said...

ahh but how do you know if you're in the 5% that are doomed?

I, Like The View said...

how do you know if you're not, until it's too late and you died of something else?

Rog said...

The other 19 go even quicker from deep fried mars bars, capstan full strength, heroin and Billy Connolly.
Is "rye expression" Scots for projectile vomiting?

Dave said...

Does this include alcohol-related deaths (ie from motor accidents, eating deep fried mars bars, smoking capstan full strength, injesting heroin and watching Billy Connolly whilst intoxicated)?

We have a right to know.

Vicus Scurra said...

Ziggi, Don't be silly. I am not. I am not Scottish.
ILTV. See my reply to Ziggi. You girls, honestly.
Rog. You live in Norfolk, please try to be circumspect about criticising other local peculiarities.
Dave. Yes. Thank you for your concern.

zIggI said...

I was going to put 'how does one know...' but then I remembered this was your blog and not Dave the pedant's and thought, foolishly, I would get away with it.

Also I thought you were Scottish with those legs.

Donn said...

I am fairly certain that the Scottish tradition of throwing rocks at each other's heeds
(which was absolutely proven beyond a shadow of a doubt in Braveheart so don't snicker)explains why they dive into toilets and walk a thewsund miles ta eat haggis.

Tell me Vicus, why are they so bloody parsimonious?

Boz said...

Christ I could do with a drink.