Friday, August 14, 2009

Underselling

I received from a chap called Howard asking me to provide "Words from the author" to compliment a website he is creating to provide a new search engine on the electronic internet.
(I did not wish to burst his bubble that Theodore and Evadne Google are occupied full time with their nice little search facility, and so if he wanted to compete with them he would need one or even two assistants).
Anyway, here is what I sent to him. I think it is a fair and modest assessment of what these pages are all about.


This important website offers the definitive analysis of the state of the planet in this time of darkness.
It offers succour to the needy, hope to the desperate, information to the inquisitive, astute analysis to the knowledge-seeker, wisdom to the student and love to all.
Diurnal study will provide weaponry against the fickleness of God and the randomness of fate.
Proud readers will tell their descendants "I read Scurra, and look where I am today!"
Thousands will campaign to have monuments erected to honour the author and grandchildren of Spielberg will be forced to admit that the making of a film could never do justice to the importance of these words.



Scurra.

4 comments:

Dave said...

I think you are too modest, Scurra. the word 'crap' appears to be missing from your summary.

Rog said...

"Love to all" doesn't ring a bell.

Unless it's a euphemism.

G Eagle Esq said...

Heil Braun

It is interessant how BADLY this Country is being governed while Our Dear Leader is away in Pictland, doing his Community Service

I flatter myself that I agree with the entertaining Magistro Vico on so many things

- like the correct spelling & pronounciation of Plough (unlike Senor FFE)

- apart of course on whether Westminster Abbey should be bull-dozed - in order to liberate cash for the Church of England AND land for building Social Housing on a Brown Field site FOR those Poorly-Paid and much under-appreciated Public Servants - the MPs

BUT you seem to have omitted apposite and timeous words like :

entertaining - amusant - anti-soviet

I suppose this comes of excessive humility

J'ai l'Honneur de rester le vestre Servant

L'Aigle Gris

wv glestow

Is this some obscure Wessex Dialect

Donn said...

Oye always tell me Lan'lord, y'er bloody rights I read Scurra, an jus look where it got me eh ya wee poncy git?
Oye'ze on top 'o the bleedin' world Oye iz, and yee can 'ave y'er feckin' mo-nay when Oye blawdy well feels loik givin' it to yee.
*smashes beer mug on Copper's face and throws up on me shoes

word verification: runed!