Wednesday, March 29, 2006

You will excuse me a little rant, won't you - I'm poorly you know?

According to the BBC:
Tony Blair has called for a "technological revolution comparable to the internet" to slow global warming.
Speaking in New Zealand, he said it was important to develop machines which produce fewer emissions, while maintaining economic growth.

Yes, and then someone can invent a drug to cure all diseases, and someone else can invent a device for sucking all of the pollutants out of the sky, and someone else can discover a microbe that converts sand to soil, so the great deserts can be fertile.
I know. This is probably nothing like what he said. I do not believe everything that I read. But it does come fairly close to his policy. Leave it up to someone else, just like Maggie did, it doesn’t matter if it is of importance to the survival of life on earth. What a complete bastard the man is.
We can have an end to all wars – as long as we maintain economic growth.
We can reduce medical waiting lists - as long as we maintain economic growth.
Fuck off. I apologise to my friends in New Zealand for having to put up with the twat. Send him back, we’re used to him.
To him and all his myopic motherfucking friends who think that business comes first, just Fuck Off. Fuck right off. Fuck right off now.

Not quite as eloquent and reasoned as Mr Gamon, but it gets the point across does it not?


Kyahgirl said...

That is an excellent rant. Tony Blair has had part of his brain rotted away since he started getting cozy with Dubya.

Mike said...

We're trying to keep out of his way and the volume buttons are well used whenever he (or his ilk of whch there seem to be many) appear on the TV screen.

Not long and he will be gone.

And then I can get back to my laboratory in the shed at the bottom of the garden as I finalise my machine that will ensure peace and love are the only goals we strive towards .. whilst maintaining a health growing economy.

tom909 said...

Ah but Vicus, without economic growth where would we be. Where does satisfaction come from if it is not from the endless pursuit of material goods. I look forward with excitement to the endless torrent of technological progress - maybe one day they will develop a way of enlarging Tony's arsehole so that he can communicate with us in even greater depth.

Interpreter Pavlov said...

Sorry to hear you've been laid low. Not good news. But there's no purgative to match a good rant. Really clears out the system, probably evacuating all those microbes so necessary to soil health. The great British intestine will void Blair in due course. It might be the right time to buy shares in Andrex. Happy recovery.

tom909 said...

Seriously Vicus, I've been out there shovelling shit and thinking about your latest post. Are you trying to tell me that having spent the last 55 years trying to acheive satisfaction through the pursuit of consumer durables, I may in fact have been seriously mislead.
I find this hard to accept. I went to a reputable grammar school you know - how could this happen to me! I'm absolutely mortified by my jolly bad luck.
Please tell me that you are not just jumping on the green bandwagon for the sake of it. Surely there must be some material gain in it for you somewhere. Why don't you just stick a fucking windmill on your house and fuck off, upsetting me like this.

Vicus Scurra said...

Tom, of course I have the answer for you! I've heard that there is lots of easy money to be made from EU handouts by opening an organic farm in somewhere like Devon. Give it a try - you can have your cake (vegan and organic) and eat it!

cowkd - less than flattering reference to modern singer.

Mark Gamon said...

I'll get to this as soon as I'm back at my desk.

meanwhile, I concur:

Fuck OFF, Tony.

Kat said...

Dear Vicus,

I don't know what to tell you on this one, other than Dubya seems to have him Mr. Blair by the short hairs. I was actually apologizing to my dentist-in the middle of a root canel-for the mess we had generally created allowing this whackjob, Bush, the keys to the car and the credit card. My fondest wish is that he chokes on it.

My best wishes for your recovery. I wish the same for us.

Geoff said...

Business comes first. Then Tony has to pull himself off.

Lin said...

yeah, eff off tony and w and get well soon, vic.

raincoaster said...

Well, since Tony's in Jakarta today, I'd suggest you leave it in the hands of the Indonesians. From my experience I'd have to say a nice clean "disappearing" would not be out of the question. Of course, neither would a nice, clean rending from limb to limb and parading the head around on a pike...

When I was in Indonesia, we were invited to meet the Head Man of the village. He got the title because he'd collected more heads than anyone else. No word of a lie! You can bet we were very polite.

Vicus Scurra said...

The same is true in Cirencester, raincoaster.

Ruth said...

According to the ever-reliable Hotmail newsboard, Americans have just realised that the war in Iraq is really a very nasty thing.
It must be true that they see the world in a simulacrum of reality, constructed for them by network TV.
Maybe this is the first note of their collective wake-up call.
Fuck off Tony and Dubya!

Kyahgirl said...

Feeling any better yet ?

Vicus Scurra said...

Kyahgirl, thank you, I am slowly on the mend, and looking for victims into which I can sinking my yellowing fangs.

Pamela Troeppl said...

You may sink them into me, but gently.

Hope you're feeling better soon.