Not for the first time, I have to extend my sympathies to my non
It is this continuity that provided structure in the latter days of the empire, and leads to a feeling of contentment against a backdrop of a bewildering world in the breasts of the British gentry.
It is therefore strangely comforting to discover, due to the good graces of the writers of the Telegraph, that the current Pope, “Ratty” to his mates, does not indulge in a huge love of popular music. Apparently, he is also a Roman Catholic. I will return to this theme.
The article from which I learned these important lessons describes how Ratty, when he was a mere cardinal, attempted to intervene in a concert organised by the church in which the popular beat singer, Mr Robert Dylan, was due to perform. It appears that Ratty’s objection was not to Mr Dylan being “up himself”, which would have had some justification, but rather that he saw him as some sort of evangelical threat to the stability of the church. John Paul, on the other hand, adopted some of the words as performed by Mr Dylan as the basis of his sermon. Fortunately, or perhaps not, on this particular day Mr Dylan had chosen to perform “Blowin’ in the Wind” rather than “Lay, Lady, Lay” or “Positively 4th Street”. I will desist from further comment on Mr Dylan as it upsets Mark so, and we can ill afford that.
What you have read so far is what the Telegraph would like you to believe. The head of the catholic church is a conservative, reactionary traditionalist with strong views about the need to keep things as they are. There is a lot to be said for keeping things as they are. This is the way God created the world, and woe betide anyone who queries the design.
However, I should let you know that in this report, as in many others, the Telegraph has crossed the boundary of accuracy, by some considerable distance. I telephoned Ratty this morning. He was a little annoyed that I called while “Wheel of Fortune” was on, but either because of his impeccable manners, or his desire not to lose me as an advisor, he managed to gloss over it. Within a few minutes we were chatting away and reminiscing about the many times that we spent together, prominent among which was the time that, high on mescaline, we tried to urinate on Leonard Cohen while he was singing “Suzanne” at the
So, kids, you cannot, alas, believe all that you read in the media. While it may be some time before the church publicly embraces rock and roll, and we see Grace Slick appointed as Cardinal of San Francisco, do not be too surprised if the contents of your last confession feature in the lyrics on the new Kaiser Chiefs album.