Thursday, March 01, 2007

Look. Stop it. Even realdoc is in on the act now. This bloody word “cute”. In my dictionary it is close to another four letter word that begins with ‘cu’ and for good reason. It is also close to “cut” which is what should probably be done without any penalties to the throat of anything that is described as “cute”. Bollocks to it. Just bloody stop it, will you. Even my lovely niece uses the word, and I am not one of those who allows the excuse of ‘being American’. She usually uses it to describe babies or something equally tedious. And as for the person, and yes you know who you are, who sent me photographs of their as yet unborn baby, well you can just blooming well stop it. Now. I don’t want to have anything to do with your babies until they are old enough to sensibly opine about the composition of a world cricket team, or at least of an age when they can be taught to pull my finger. No, sod off, the lot of them. Cute? Shove it.

Even they are nowhere near as bad as the proponents of phrases such as “future planning”. What other kind of bollocky planning is there, numbnuts? And even worse “pre-planning”. Fuck right off.

I think that will do for now. Anyone need a babysitter?

13 comments:

MJ said...

Don't play cute with us, Vicus.

Pamela said...

rVicus dear, you're too cute when you get your knickers in a knot like this!

You really should do it more often.

Dave said...

Vicus, are you trying to tell us something?

I, like the view said...

you do baby sitting as well? what a talented chap

Mr. X said...

Even if you do use the 'cute' word, and you should be shot if you do, babies are not it. They are noisy, smelly and a pain in the arse. (Americans, please note the correct spelling).
I also hate the word 'quaint' and all those who use it. Your vitriolic thoughts, please

ziggi said...

hey cutie-pie love it when you're riled - kiss kiss

raincoaster said...

Squid. Tapeworms. Unexplained moist patches you put your hand in when you weren't paying attention. Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.

There, have a shot of Cute Antidote.

Richard said...

No thoughts on Lewis last night, then? It was the first one I've watched all the way through. I thought it was better than Morse.

First Nations said...

darling, dear, cunning, precious, charming?

'say, that's a very bilaterally symmetrical infant you have there. it looks very nearly human, in fact.'

Edseverripit said...

Ugh. Now I know where my friends got all this "Valleygirl-ism" from... Quite ridiculous, really. I find nothing cute about the word "cute"

awaiting said...

This is such a cute post! So flowery and sugary and sweet!

What about when people say 'up ahead'...I mean, come on!

Homo Escapeons said...

Gee whillikers Mr Scurra you sure seem to hate babies.
I'm afraid to even ask about puppies, bunnies, and kittens.

My uncle Forrest always said that Cute is as Cute does.

Foilwoman said...

Well, the FoilKids aren't just cute: they are the pinnacle of human evolution. And no, I will not subject you to their sonograms, baby pictures, or pictures of developmental milestones or other things that make you say "Awwww!" I hope you can adjust to the loss.