I was delighted to find out, during the course of my monitoring TCM at livescience.com, that they, in partnership with National Geographic Expeditions, are offering a trip to the DDay landings. For the modest sum of $5580 you can fly from New York to London, nip in to St Paul’s, then via Portsmouth get a ferry to the beaches in Normandy, where you will be decimated by the local friendly machine-gun wielding inhabitants. Those unfortunate enough to survive will be treated to some vile French food (yes, it is tautology, but over-emphasis is sometimes necessary).
If my American friends (a Mrs Trellis of North Wyoming) value my advice, I would caution them not to come. Violent death is seldom the exciting climax to a vacation that the travel agents would have you believe. This does not apply to dear Adam, who is currently working in Target. On balance, it is probably safer for you to risk being massacred on Utah beach than to work in a branch of Target in the southern states; we have all seen ‘Deliverance’.
PS - the Telegraph have realised that the value of their site will be enhanced by my patronage, and have consented to publish my comment.
7 comments:
Vicus - I'm not easily impressed - but I just love that comment in the Torygraph.
I'm proud to know you, even though I don't.
Oh dear - What was the rest of the post about?
It's pronounced "Tarjhay" with a cheesy fake French accent, Vicus, by those who know the value of buying Budweiser by the case.
Your comment was worthy of Oscar Wilde, my dear. Bravo!
Leave me out of that tour.
signed: Mrs. Trellis from Miami
Loved your comment Mr. Scurra. As always, very entertaining and with one important bonus. I actually understood the entire thing!
Also, some of your readers would like you to tell us what aMToNW
means.
"I am always suspicious of anyone reading the Telegraph. I suspect that many of the readers are actually dead, and are posed holding the newspaper to look as if they are reading by greedy relatives to avoid inheritance tax."
--Vicus Scurra
Priceless.
So this explains why newspaper subscriptions in the UK are the only ones on the planet to have not declined in recent years.
And on the trip to the D-Day Landings...
Why not just enlist in the U.S., UK or Canadian Armed Forces and get decimated for free in far more exotic places like Iraq or Afghanistan?
So worth the visit to your site...
Or just come to my house and leap out a second story window. It's all the rage right now.
Jack, they probably will not even read it, let alone understand or appreciate it.
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