It certainly takes a while to catch up with reading all of the comments and new articles that have been posted by my many virtual friends while I have been away. My goodness, you are very productive.

Fortunately, none of you have felt it necessary to try to usurp my position by writing anything that is amusing, interesting, creative, informative, original or in any way worthwhile, so I am reassured that I can have another little break at some stage without too much to worry about.

A few brief comments while I find my feet (explains why the typing is so slow. Just read slowly, or, like Tom, keep pace with me by enunciating each letter).

1) Missouri, for some reason (I suppose there is a reason, but being in the heartland of Bush voters that may be presumptuous), is known as the “Show me” state. The local sheriff’s department is not very sympathetic to those of us who mistake the intent behind this motto.
2) Next time I am away, please do not allow Fred Trueman to die. There has not been a world class English bowling partnership since the days of Trueman and Statham, and I was hoping for a comeback. Now that both of them are dead I suppose that has become unlikely. Warning. I may write more about Trueman later, notwithstanding Richard’s contribution. Look away if men’s stuff offends.
3) I must apologise to John Motson. The football commentators on ABC are much worse than him, in the same way that we thought it was not possible to get a president who was more stupid than Reagan.