Friday, December 19, 2008

Some useful advice

Always have a box of tissues nearby

18 comments:

The Mistress said...

Always have a box of tissues nearby

As opposed to the ratty old towel you keep tied to your bedpost?

Vicus Scurra said...

Your concern is touching. I do suffer from nasal engorgement, and what is a cold to one man is a plague to another. And thank you for the offer, but I do not need you to be tied to my bedpost, I know where to find you should the need arise.

Geoff said...

Dasal sduffidess?

Oh, Balcolm!

Romeo Morningwood said...

That is the dumbest thing that I have ever heard..getting laid is nothing to sneeze at!

Vicus Scurra said...

Right back at you. (Atchoo, geddit????). I laughed so much I sneezed.

Romeo Morningwood said...

I understand that you have needs, but I'd prefer to keep this relationship platonic if possible.

Dave said...

I will never be able to watch Snow White and the Seven Dwarves again.

Anonymous said...

And here I was just dropping by to check on you and I find out about your engorgement!

Vicus Scurra said...

Dave. That was excellent, thank you. (Funny already this year, and it's only December).
Deb. Not something that I can keep quiet, alas. So many gossips around, don't you know?

tom909 said...

That's astonishing! And I thought I just had a plain simple little old allergy.

I, Like The View said...

finally an explanation for why some people sneeeze at sunlight

as for the other study, I don't think that 18 people is a big enough group for statistically valid research - and what about a control group?

I demand some sex please, so that I can conduct my own experiment and draw my own conclusions

I hope you will direct me in this persuit, all in the name of science of course

Vicus Scurra said...

Tom. I think that you are confusing two distinct sounds. What you take for women sneezing when they see you approaching is known elsewhere as "projectile vomiting".
ILTV. You need to be less ambiguous in what you mean by "direct". If you mean can I point you, figuratively, in the right direction, then I probably can, but am loathe to take the responsibility. I think you may regret asking, because if you were to examine the routes that visitors take to get to this site, you will find that many of them are the most undesirable sort of pervert, and the regular readers are probably even worst (yes I know you can't be worse than the most undesirable, but I am not retyping all of that at this time of night). If you mean direct in the cinematic sense, then I may consider it, provided that I can work with Polanski and Scorsese, and that you have camera lenses that do not get steamed up.

I, Like The View said...

you are too kind

any sort of direction* will do

thanking you in advance (*if you can come up with Polanski and Scorsese, then I'd like Brad Pitt - as in Meet Joe Black - or the new Bond chap - as long as he wears boardshorts, not those dreadful trunks from his first film - or Ewan McGregor - I'm not fussy how he dresses, if at all - or Johnny Depp - as a pirate - and I have some de-misting spray, if this helps)

Vicus Scurra said...

I've done a quick check and messrs Pitt et al are not available for some time. Dave has offered to step in, and Donn has some interesting ideas.

I, Like The View said...

oh vicus

)-:

didn't you know? I'm too tall* for Dave (and my hair is the wrong colour**) - I too was shocked when I discovered this, but there you go

*and no quips about the horizontal vs the vertical (my hair will still be the wrong colour)(**and, while we're at it, no quips about pubes either)

and I find all, not just some, of Donnnnnnnnnnnn's ideas interesting

Dave said...

I was only describing my ideal woman. Any port in a storm.

FirstNations said...

dis is dot fuddy. dis is a se'ious probleb. sub beoble hab esperi...hab had, a lifetibe of misery due to dis probleb. dere is do medical recourse eider. all dey do is laugh at be.

would you blease go stad sobwere else ad be sexy Bicus??!!?

Zig said...

I wondered why I always sneezed when I visited you Sid.