Friday, July 21, 2006

Having grown somewhat tired of Boris playing the same record, just with more volume to try to get attention, I have decided to begin a relationship with Bill Deedes over at the Telegraph. I left a little comment on his latest article today (I doubt whether it will appear on line). I feel in need of friendly Tories to abuse, and have a great admiration for Bill. I hope that we can develop a new series of Dear Bill letters, because my world wide recognition is well over due, and who better to combat than a nonagenarian?

I have never had a letter published in the Torygraph. I expect that my views are about 12 centuries too early. They do a very good sports section, however, and don’t usually miss anyone of note in their obituary section (apart from the living who seem to be curiously neglected). Did you know that Peter Hawkins had died, for instance? Their on line fantasy football competition is also excellent. Yes, Richard, I pay to compete in that. On top of my subscription to Murdochvision. Good job you don’t know about my collection of Cecil Parkinson speeches, isn’t it?

Bill Deedes was famously the inspiration for Boot in “Scoop”. If anyone missed the filmed version with Donald Pleasance as Lord Copper, then try to rectify that forthwith. For people in North America, the DVD is available from Amazon.

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Boris will be so hurt to find out you're clicking around on him.

Zig said...

Well fancy, and that Haile Selassie can still run really fast - didn't realise he was so old

Anonymous said...

He's well known to me without having to buy the Telegraph. I'm an Ashfordian and Deedesh was the MP for Ashford from 1698 until 1974.

He has fairly recently written a book, "At War with Waugh: The Real Story of Scoop" which may shed some light on the Boot rumours. Never read either, I have to add.

Vicus, you must be starting to feel like Michael Atherton walking out to face Glenn McGrath. You pay? Haven't the Barclays got enough?

Mark Gamon said...

You seem to know a suspiciously enormous lot about the Telegraph.

Anonymous said...

Actually, Cecil P wasn't a bad bloke for a Tory. As Lord P, he used to be Chairman of the Dartford River Crossing when I was there and it was good to hear tales of the fawning and scraping that went on round him. What the management didn't know was that one of our number used to caddy for him at golf and that Cec was therefore rather well informed about all the snide strokes management were pulling on the blue collars. More than once he stood up for us and embarrassed the suits. Respec!

Anonymous said...

oh. OH. Now I get it, Vicus.

Boris is sending you a free book. So now you leave him.

It's the same old story; once you finally put out for them, they make tracks. On to the next conquest, eh?

Vicus Scurra said...

Pavlov. Thank you. Yawn.
Ziggi - welcome. Thank you for the obfuscation.
Richard. I believe my ISP is owned by Enron.
Mark. Since when was knowledge a misdemeanour?
Raincoaster. I already won one free book from Boris's site. I only suggested a competition for others. I don't think I could face having to read another one.

Mark Gamon said...

Just stirrin', old chum. Just stirrin'. Besides, I imagine it's good on cricket...

Unknown said...

I'd like to point out that I haven't understood a single comment here, much less the post that inspired them.

That is all.

Vicus Scurra said...

And that makes this thread different from all of the others in the sense that....?

Unknown said...

Nothing really. Just thought I'd toss my two cents in.

WithinWithout said...

Have no idea who Cecil Parkinson is (or Boris for that matter; give me a break, I'm from the colonies).

But I agree entirely that you are long overdue for worldwide recognition.

Or, at least, a role in a reprised Monty Python episode, or world consternation.

If you find some Tories to abuse, pls do blog about them. I'm sure you'll tenderly tear them to shreds.

And pls consider also focusing your sights on such North American right-wing pretenders as Dubya and his new toy plaything/puppet, Canada's Prime Minister Stephen Harper.

Or, just get off the Web so the missus won't be missusing you.

Anonymous said...

I don't think Vicus should bother much with Harper. The man entered office a lame duck. Once the Liberals get their shit together, they, the Bloc and the NDP will wipe the floor with him. DOA.

Frontier Editor said...

I think Vicus presents the perfect focus to revive Ealing Studios and its comedies on British society.

WithinWithout said...

I'd like to go back to Pam's comment about not understanding a single comment nor, for that matter, the post that inspired them.

HA HA HA!!! That's the whole point!!

And to Raincoaster, perhaps you're right about Vicus ignoring Harper. Once Bush goes, he'll go.

However, Vicus appears to have gone to bed...or he's watching Coronation Street.

Dave said...

I found Scoop to be over-rated, and nowhere near as good as some of Waugh's other books.

I guess this puts me in a minority in this comment column.

tom909 said...

It is indeed unusual for me to be able to make a worthwhile contribution to such a worthy discussion. But yes Ziggi, as you correctly pointed out Haille Selasie is a fucking fast runner.

Vicus Scurra said...

Harper Marx is in charge of Canada? I will go there straight away (or in a minute and a huff).
Please be clear. I did not recommend anyone read Evelyn Waugh. Just watch the TV version (I think Michael Hordern was in it as well). All of his books are overrated, particulary that vapid drivel Brideshead. And the TV version of that is only really worth watching for the bits with Gielgud.
And don't knock Coronation Street - it is because Mrs S watches it that I am able to devote a few minutes here and there to reading your blogs.

Romeo Morningwood said...

I remember that Sellassie's chihuahua was famous for peeing on every royal carpet that they visited during his world wide rally against fascism. He always had his puppy bling. Thats probably where Paris got the idea!

I wonder if there is any direct scientific connection to inhaling ganga and supposing that Selassie, the Ras Tafari, is the "I" of Zion. Its probably a coincidence.

We were forced to read Scoop at gunpoint back in HIGH school and it was bloody awful and boring as hell. I would have preferred reading about Deedes...or ingesting more ganga before I started reading Scoop.

Anonymous said...

Oh I love Bill Deedes, I could sit at his feet and listen to his stories any day of the week. Hope your comment gets posted Vicus - mine never do. As far as Fleet St goes I'm convinced I'm invisable but I did have a minor victory with the Mail this week over publishing a comment on one of their blogs. Ha! Up yours Allison it's-so-tiresome-going-abroad Pearson.

WithinWithout said...

Well then, thank god for Coronation Street.

And Harper Marx would absolutely have a bird upon your arrival, particularly if you actually look anything like your icon.

This is a fellow who, during photo ops, shakes his son's hand instead of kissing or hugging him as he drops him off to school.

Frontier Editor said...

WW,

Then it looks like you'd better get with the Putin program and start kissing his belly in public if you want the worldwide renown you're seeking.

Anonymous said...

In Canada you can get seven years for that, creepy Russian politico or no.

WithinWithout said...

Don't remember saying I wanted world-wide reknown, but OK, I can do that.

Has Vicus nodded off again while watching CS?