Tuesday, October 31, 2006

I'll be there while I come back, tha knows.

As I have been nagged, virtually to death, by my readers (AMToNW) to resume my pepysalogical activies, I have given in and put aside my raging pustules, erupting sores and general debility to satisfy the yearnings of the less fortunate.

Whenever I announce that I am going somewhere, the curious among you all develop an unnatural desire to know why, and what I will be doing there. By curious I mean nosey, inquisitive, in possession of an aspidistra face or having too little happening in their own lives. Although the other widely used meaning of curious is equally apposite in most cases.

I am going to Yorkshire. I am going to a part of Yorkshire close to the city that was recently reported to be the worst place to live in the UK.

What I shall be doing, and why, is none of your business. I will not tell you. Keep your nose out. (I have the strange sensation that I am writing this entirely for the benefit of Pamela).

For those of you unfortunate enough to live overseas, I should perhaps tell you a few things about Yorkshire.

The late Auberon Waugh suggested that the term “Yorkshire Ripper” was tautological, and thereafter referred to said gentleman as “The Yorkshire”.

Actually, that is probably enough.

23 comments:

Boggins said...

You can allus tell a Yorkshireman. But you can't tell 'im much. Aye Parky, line 'n'length, line 'n'length.

wetbux?

Pamela said...

You know I'll find out just why you're going. I'm good that way!

Have a safe journey. You may want to take a traveling buddy with you for safety. Just in case. Might I suggest Tommy?

Mark Gamon said...

I was going to post a comment here, all witty-like about Yorkshire folk, but I was so taken aback at the reappearance of Boggins that I shan't bother now.

I declare a day of national rejoicing. We'll call it the Kykyddu (thanks to Blogger Word Verification for coming up with the apposite term at exactly the right moment)

richard said...

Mark, we could call it the spkoom. Verification is working it's little rear off. Welcome back Boggins and Vicus, 'appen we'll seethee.

Vicus Scurra said...

He's back! It's the same one!
Where have you been, Boggins, and why? Pamela - get on to him.

gfnres - resident of the great fucking north. Spooky isn't it?

Mark Gamon said...

Richard - we could go one better and call 'Boggins Day' the Kykyddu Spkoom. It's the kind of phrase that would appeal to our reappeared hero.

tom909 said...

So Vicus, you are going to within a few mils of the worst city to live in in the UK. I think that place is Hull isn't it, and isn't that also where the sweet Cherry pie lives.
I'm wracking my brains here Pammy - I can't think of anyone up there that Vicus knows, maybe he is just taking a break from the tedium that is his every day life. Ah, I've got it, I bet he's going to check gravestones - he's got this thing about his ancestors.

Vicus Scurra said...

Tom, the only gravestone I will check is yours. Make sure there are no escape hatches.

Dave said...

My mother comes from Yorkshire, so I could claim to be half a Yorkshireman. Not having been born in the county, I was not eligible to play for them. That, and not being good enough.

realdoc said...

My only Yorkshire story is about Fred Trueman who once said when referring to Darren Gough's arse...'it takes a big hammer to drive a big nail', made me splutter that one.

I thought Hackney was the worst place to live, maybe it's just places beginning with H.

word ver osxfkkdn...by the seeeeaaa

Pamela said...

so vicus is into genealogy. What a surprise!

Rub a few headstones for me, would you vicus dear.

Adam said...

Sounds like another one of Vicus' drug deals...

Vicus Scurra said...

Adam, sorry, I missed my regular run up from Columbia to Y'All Mississippi. What can I get you next time? Speed, Acid, Dope? Or some more of that hormone treatment - give it time.
I hope the rest of you have been to visit Adam and see his latest creation.

The Murphmeister said...

Perhaps Boggins has been working on "Lembit & Sian" the musical.

Hull is in South Humberside this month unless they've moved it again.

Mark Gamon said...

Vicus - if you ever feel well enough again, I could do with some of your pithy oneliners over on Boris's website. I appear to be at war...

Betty said...

The shocking return of Boggins, Adam making his movie directing debut and now Interpreter Pavlov's blog reappears with just the words "Coming up for parole" at the top of the page. The spirits must have been moving in mysterious ways last night ...

Mark Gamon said...

Speak for yourself, Betty. I enjoyed an uninterrupted night's sleep...

(Ba-boom, missus)

Vicus Scurra said...

Murphmeister, I would desist from pedantry if the rumours about the return of the Interpreter are true. The place I am going to is in East Yorkshire. I said NEAR Hull.
Mark. I have written 48 unpithy lines. Best I could do. Sorry.
Betty. This is glorious news, but I can see no evidence of it. Please post the link.

richard said...

Hull is a Metropolitan district thingy isn't it? And it's on North Humberside, surely?

The Murphmeister said...

Sorry Vicus.

I seem to have led a pedant's revolt.

Which Tyler

Mark Gamon said...

Vicus - thank you. They did the trick. They've all gone quiet now.

richard said...

Sorry, I find it difficult to sleep if I don't get it off my chest. It's the autistic side.

Cherrypie said...

OMG! I thought the temperature had dropped suddenly.

Why didn't you say - you could have bought me lunch. ( That's why you didn't say, clearly)

Murphmeister - it was NORTH Humberside but hasn't been since 1994 but no-one appears to have informed the Post Office.

Tom - I work there but actually live in the area formerly known as South Humberside